能不能回到从前？

People have told me to just forget it, just let it go, just pretend everything never happened. I've come to the point where I still think of you now and then but I'm too tired to even talk about you. I've reached a stage where I can no longer tell anyone about how I feel about you because I have told everyone possible and they are probably by now tired of hearing me say the same things over and over and over again.

But how can I just pretend you never existed when you were once my best friend, and irreplaceable. Although we were sort of in a clique, we had the most in common, we even shared the same surname damn it. You were not perfect, nobody is, but you could make me laugh and we shared so many memories as a duo and as a clique. We did so many stupid things together as teenagers and we grew up together. Others may be able to forget, but I know I'll always remember you. If I could turn time back, I would never have allowed a msn conversation to destroy what we all shared, even if sometimes we really buay tahan.

I wonder how you're doing now. Are you happy now? What course are you doing now? How are your new friends? I wanna talk to you, I want to see if you've changed. There were many times I nearly text him to ask about you, but I figured it would be awkward and he would most probably tell you about it so it was to me, in all sense inappropriate. And you probably hate me so I told myself to just forget it. In fact, I nearly did it just a few seconds ago, for the nth time. And it kills me every single time I have delete the unsent text.

I wish God would tell me what I can do.

Deep down, I really miss you.