19 days.

Was studying F&B and Econs when from the corner of my eye,

I thought I saw you preparing your kaya bread in the kitchen.

I turned my head around, but there was no kaya, no bread, no butter knife, no you.

I swear I smelt the fragrance of the kaya you like.

(Okay great I'm already tearing before I even started.)

Since you left, I've only shed 2 drops of tears. I think you saw.

You must have been shaking your head cause you won't want me to cry for you.

But then ah, they keep repeating the same sentence from the scriptures and I had nothing to do so I looked in front and I saw you then I miss you then I sad mah so tear lo. Cannot blame me one okay?

But since that time, nope, not even a single drop.

I held it all in. I'm your strong girl ain't I?

Are you proud of me?

I never thought that I would lose you so soon.

It was so sudden. No last words, nothing.

Although everytime you would causally tell me that you're old and that you were passing on,

I've always believed you'll live till a ripe old age.

That'll you see me marry the love of my life, create little mischievous angels like myself,

help me take care of my angels who will be scampering around endlessly like the small me.

I still remember when I was young, really young,

I used to tag along with you to the wet market, and then we'll go to the supermarket.

I'll fall in love with some stupid shit toys and you'll always, always buy them for me.

All the funny keychains and weird looking pencils, I still remember.

The way you would laugh at me and tell me they were useless but still buy them for me anyway.

I would stumble behind you and all your groceries, carrying a small bag of vegetables and my toys.

Then I grew older, and I stopped following you around like a lost puppy.

I would be in school and when I come home, you'll be preparing for work.

Your green rectangular bag? You've never changed it all these years.

In the mornings when I come over, you'll be fast asleep.

I used to sit beside your mattress doing random stuff.

You were always so tired that you don't even realize.

Friday nights I would stay over,
sleep in your mattress and look up at your clothes hanging from the windows.

I knew you were at work and I'll just count the dinosaurs on the sheets till I fall asleep.
Somehow every Saturday morning I get my soya bean milk chilled.

I know you left them out there to cool then into the fridge to chill.

Whenever I go to the market to get stuff, I'll specially pass by the shelter where you and your friends usually would be at, just to see if you were there.

And if you were, I'll shout "AH GONG" damn loudly. Heh.

You'll proudly tell all your friends that I'm your granddaughter.

I can see it from the look in your eyes, the smile on your face.

And I'm really proud to have you too you know?
You're one of the greatest man I've ever known.

There's still so many so many things I remember about you.

But I can't go on. 

My nose and eyes are coming off. I feel the skin peeling liao nah!

I miss you.