Well, properly.
It's nearly the end of the first quarter of 2011 already.
I'm scared/amazed/excited at how fast time is actually moving.
Day after day, and it can't be rewound.
However, so many things happened in this short quarter of 2011.
& 2 things, changed my life forever.
1. I BECAME A DROPOUT.
2. I EXPERIENCED GOD'S MIRACLE.
1. I BECAME A DROPOUT.
Was this a hard decision for me? Of course it was. I thought through it many many times, weighing the odds and stuff. Thinking back to when I was considering if I should leave college, I realized what I couldn't put down the most was the people there. Every single one of them who I've come to know, love and fought with. Come to think of it, whatever happened to low profile?(:
The people. They are an awesome bunch of people. Really. Although it was only for a few months, it feels like we've known each other since like forever. My PDG especially, forever so supporting. I'll never forget how they have been there to push me on, to hold me hand, to assure me that whatever decision I make they would support me till the end. Even when they know it's gonna hurt either ways.
My tennis team. We're not a strong team, definitely not. But we certainly do have a burning passion for tennis. (: We're not like the seeded players who literally creates a void on the court with every ball they hit. We...we just play for the love of playing. Sure, all the perspiration, screams and blood, hahaha, yeah blood. All the feelings just made it so difficult to leave.
The randoms. The bits and pieces of random people that made my life at AJC so much more interesting. From camps, orientation and those"we-just-became-friends-i-forgot-how-though". I remember how I keep bumping into them and told them that I was leaving and most of them said "I know. :(" to me. I have no idea how news got out since I did not speak a word about it. One even stop me while I was tumbling to another place and asked about my plans. I don't know but it felt so warm to know that they care.(:
2. I EXPERIENCED GOD'S MIRACLE.
Why did I dropout then? Not considering the human factor, I could have stayed on for another year and probably be faster than the new students that would enter the horrendous college. To be ahead of them, ain't that less tough? Should I? Should I not? No one would agree to me transferring to another institution to waste anymore time. Logically, I should just retain and sit for the A levels the year after. Maybe I would do better. However, I was unwilling to put myself through another year of hell. I know I hated college life and forcing me through another year of it wouldn't change anything. People always say :"If you never try, you'll never know." I tried.
While I was pondering, my aunt suddenly sat next to me asked if I wanted to transfer to a polytechnic instead. I was stunned. Or rather, I didn't believe her words at first. She was the one who objected so strongly to me going to a polytechnic and caused my whole family (yes I have a BIG family) to follow her suit and objected too. No matter how much I tried to fight for my own rights, I failed.
A decision between the heart and the mind? I chose the former.
"It is important to know what you do not want. Sometimes when you go through a period of great difficulty and struggle, it is so that you can finally realize what you do NOT want in your life. Then finally, at long last, you can embrace what you DO want."
A decision between the heart and the mind? I chose the former.
"It is important to know what you do not want. Sometimes when you go through a period of great difficulty and struggle, it is so that you can finally realize what you do NOT want in your life. Then finally, at long last, you can embrace what you DO want."
God never forsakes.
